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[staysail]

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[hassaran]

I haven't! I don't have a voice, that's just how they sound in plays and things, isn't it? I have never seduced a Chantry sister, I [ a brief but deeply suspicious pause to confirm ] swear. I swear.

[staysail]

Oh, aye? In all those plays, where Chantry sisters get seduced? That's what they sound like in those? Must've skipped Afsaana with that one, 'cos I never saw it. That little pause isn't doing anything for your story either, by the way. The way you just said it. Little pause like that, sounds t' me like you might have, actually.

[hassaran]

It happens in every Orlesian comedy!

I haven't, [ she insists, laughing, but it is harder to deny the suspiciousness of that pause, and the way she pauses again, now, does nothing to make her seem less guilty. ]

But I did once seduce someone as a Chantry Sister. And there was a Lay Brother, another time. I don't think that counts.

[staysail]

[The second pause gets another laugh, surprised.]

You were acting as a Lay Brother? Or you seduced a Lay Brother, as a Chantry Sister? I just want to make sure I've got the details correct. Am I ever going to know everything about you? First Viana Velez of Kaiten, and her librarian, now this.

[hassaran]

[ Dry, incredulous: ] Would you want to? There were a few years where most of my missions were that sort.

But no, if you must know, the Lay Brother was a completely separate incident, I was not in disguise as a Chantry Sister at the time, and I didn't really seduce him, I just led him on and knocked him out.

[staysail]

Fair point. Just tell me they were Orlesian plays instead.

Leading him on and knocking him out is familiar, at least. You weren't going to do that to me, were you? That first night in the village?

[hassaran]

Of course not. [ Teasing: ] You clearly were not a source of intelligence.

Familiar how?

[staysail]

[Indignant,] Cruel. And still so full of mysteries.

Anyways, I don't mean familiar exactly. More similar to stories I've heard before.

[hassaran]

What does her voice sound like in those?

[ Not a real question. This one is: ]

Do you really want to know these sorts of things?

[staysail]

[Not quite ready to be serious--]

Depends. Is the Lay Brother going t' show up at the Gallows asking after his merry Osburga who left him with a broken heart?

[hassaran]

[ That's acceptable. She laughs. ]

Osburga! Maker, I think I'd need a false nose at least to carry that one off.

And no, I think it extremely unlikely you'll ever be faced with him.

[staysail]

Well, that's a comfort. The lack of Brothers, that is. Not the nose. Osburga comes of Ostwick, don't you think? What's an Ostwick nose look like?

[hassaran]

I don't know, but an Osburga nose is large. Bulbous. This is quite far from where I thought this conversation was headed.

[staysail]

You're disappointed to be talking about your bulbous false nose with your husband?

[hassaran]

A purely hypothetical false nose. And 'disappointed' isn't the word.

[ In that voice again: ] I'm never disappointed to be talking to you.

[staysail]

[Caught off-guard by the expert deployment of that voice, Darras laughs again.]

Oh, now you're cheating, with that.

[hassaran]

[ In a different voice, closer to her own but still definitely not--same accent but pitched deeper, smokier, and with an almost sing-songy cadence-- ]

What are you going to do about it?

[staysail]

Come and put a stop to it. Now.

[hassaran]

[ Her laugh is her own, quick and pleased. ]

If only. I had to meet a contact on the other side of the city. I won't be back for at least an hour.

[staysail]

After all that? You can be back sooner. Half an hour.

[hassaran]

I can't make the distance shorter! As soon as I can.

Leave the stuff in the tub, I was serious about it needing a wash. There's a box on the shelf behind my desk with some other examples. If you want.

[staysail]

Personal cuffs in a box on the shelf behind your desk?

[hassaran]

It's all different kinds of locks, for practice.

[staysail]

It's so hard to believe you now that I know you went around soliciting and collecting unwashed sex cuffs and left 'em in our bathtub.

Can you not get a carriage to get back sooner? Run it, maybe? Horse?

[hassaran]

You make fun and then you want me to run back to you in the freezing rain?

They're for the class, I need enough examples for everyone in Riftwatch. They may be perfectly clean, but I don't trust them.